I wanted to talk about something that I don't feel like is spoken about and praised enough for voice actors! I wonder if maybe it's still a bit of a taboo to talk about, or perhaps even a "don't talk about it or directors will think you're no fun to work with" sort of situation. But I dunno, I feel like it's imporant to talk about things like this sometimes, in case anyone out there feels alone with it or even curious.
I don't know how to describe an objective of this blog... other than a reflection of my life choices and to share my experience (sorry if I ramble, I'm a terrible writer!).
Perhaps I can talk about a perspective that non-VA's might not have considered, or even encourage voice actors out there to tell their experiences too, or at least reflect on how much power you have as a voice actor to get through this tough topic.
I wanted to talk about mental health and how incredible voice actors are with balancing it with their roles.
A Sunday evening example
So last week, I was pretty low. I'm going through an on-going stressful family situation, my team at my day job were made redundant - leaving me feeling horrible and stressed, I'm still suffering from what I guess is a form of PTSD from saving my cat's life last summer... the list goes on and depression has really been kicking me in the butt.
And yet, I had a job to do.
A very small project to record for, which involved playing the role of a very cheerful young character at high energy. I prepped my booth, got my script, drank some water and got ready for my session - all whilst being exhausted and feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders.
I got into my booth, paused a moment and then took a deep breathe.
And played my role as required - a youthful girl beaming with energy, excitement and determination; a totally different person in comparison to the tired, messy haired, almost 30 year old voicing her.
And afterwards, I couldn't help but reflect on how bizarre of an experience voice acting can be.
Whether you're voicing a bubbly corporate advertisement for a product, a dramatic audiodrama or an excited 'anime' type adventure character... the emotions we go through that bring characters to life can be incredibly different to our real feelings, but it is our job to push through that and make a beliveable performance.
It'll come as no suprise that voice actors have to learn how to put aside their feelings on the spot in some cases to portray their characters and scripts of totally different experiences, attitudes, beliefs, behaviours and feelings. It's a key skill to bringing an authentic performance to the table.
I've suffered with varying levels of depression for probably around 14 years, and have only just recently been diagnosed with anxiety too (and am further investigating my troubles still with doctors). Luckily, voice acting/singing was an avenue for me to mask these feelings back when I started as a teenager; giving me a way of focussing my energy into something productive instead of moping around.
But I still find it kinda fascinating honestly how there's a sort of 'switch' to be flicked for our work. And I know I'm not the only one out there who'll experience what I have.
Getting into the mindset for a role
A common thing I hear about when discussing voice over is how to get better at acting authentically and really make your performances powerful.
Not much will bring you faster out of enjoying a media piece than a poor performance of emotions in a scene; whether it's someone sounding waaay too excited, sounding like they don't know how to be or why they are really angry, or perhaps even not sounding like they're actually crying.
As voice actors, we train ourselves on authenticity of emotions.
A big tip I've heard many times and advocate for myself is thinking about and relating to real life scenarios to recreate a mock version of an emotion you experienced; to bring it to your role. I've heard this described as emotion buckets, or imagining an emotion wheel, a 'feeling pantry', or even just having memories stored at the back of your mind for when you need them.
Relating to emotions might involve:
Making yourself geniunely smile with happiness via remembering a celebration you have had, a successful gift you gave, or perhaps a funny joke
Creating eerily realistic fear by imagining yourself alone in a dark room, or in a scary horror film/game situation
A dramatic love speach can potentially sound way better if you're imagining saying it to someone you hold very dear to you
Or even thinking about a very sad time you've gone through to try and recapture that distraught tone of voice for an upset character (without upsetting yourself too much of course - be kind to yourself!)
It's not the only way of achiving a better performance, but it really does help to try and have an example to think about for a variety of emotions, so when it comes to acting - it may help you embrace the emotions needed.
An example I can speak of is my role as Jess in On My Mind from many years ago. There is a particullar scene in this animation by Shirley Zhou where Jess in being circled by a troublesome crow (a representation of her lingering struggle). It wasn't hard for me to place myself in her shoes; the feeling of everything becoming overwhelming until you feel like you are going to burst (a shout). Followed by a painful relief of just wanting to feel better (soft crying and mumbling to self after the initial release).
Having similar feelings in my mind really helped me play that role to my best, and I wasn't even really much of an actor back then!
A word of appreciation
So I guess where this was headed is that I just wanted to shout out my admiration and respect for other voice actors out there. We get to jump into the shoes of so many different characters and stories - all kinds of emotions and experiences that we may relate heavily to, or really not at all!
And yet, we can have all kinds of mess going on in our own minds and lives. I guarantee some of my favourite performances from actors have had chaos going on behind the scenes in their personal lives - yet they pull off exceptional acts and portray the characters with such respect and confidence, that absolutely blow us away as viewers.
But yeah, this was just on my mind. I don't expect/or encourage anyone to dig deep into their sad times and blast their stories for others the read (unless you want to, then fair!) but I just wanted to write this after what happened in my session on Sunday and after reflecting on how this is probably quite a normal thing voice actors go through; perhaps on the off chance that if anyone thinks about the same thing, or perhaps feels any burden/worry on this happening to them - they can read this experience too and realise how strong you are for persevering with your acting superpower.
Take care of yourselves!
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